Remember this post from way back at the dawn of the KOTWF's reign? No, don't worry, that's why there's a link to it. Go read it.
Did you read it yet? Did you? Okay, I believe you. Go ahead:
Tim calls me today from New York, and we start about the typical "I haven't spoken to you for months, how's life going, did you ever shake that case of the clap" bullshit, when we start talking about the Hairy Russian girl. He tells me that in round two of their brief relationship, she had trimmed things up a little so that it was still all covering, but at least it was short. Apparently, this was accompanied by "American Boys like hair cutting, da?" Tim responded, I think, by saying "Uh...er...ye..yess..er...wow." or something to that effect.
So then there's a round three. Apparently, the next time he visited her lotus patch, the hair was GONE. She went from Sasquatch to clean shaven in 6.4 seconds. All I have to say is, Tim, if you are out there, congratulations. I didn't think you had it in you.